Girl on cell: It doesn’t matter how many people I’ve had sex with…If I can remember each of their names, then it isn’t a lot.

–32nd & Broadway

Overheard by: Tommy

Girl on cell: You had a threesome with the mayor of what?

–144th & Broadway

Overheard by: McFreaky

NYU boy: Pear applesauce, strawberry applesauce, banana applesauce. God, it’s like the apples did every other fruit in the garden!

–Food Emporium, Union Square

Dude: And after the party, everyone gets innoculated and takes the morning after pill.

–Taj Mahal, 6th St between 1st & 2nd

Overheard by: lish

Woman: The problem is that men are paradoxically both a reason to be celibate and to have large amounts of sex.

–140th & Broadway