Lit­tle gang­ster kid: Yo, the last time I went fish­ing I got a fish­ing lure stuck in my dick.

–Prospect Park, Brook­lyn

Hobo: Every­body’s some­body on my dick!

–Union Square

Over­heard by: Re­bec­ca

Girl, to male co-work­er: Can you be a lit­tle more sub­tle and not such a dick-swinger about your Am­s­tel Light?

–Conde Nast Bldg, 57th & 8th

Over­heard by: Ken­zi

Woman: At least I don’t suck dicks for free!

–Broad­way and Put­nam, Brook­lyn

Over­heard by: Tom­mi

Drunk col­lege stu­dent: My re­deem­ing fac­tor is I will suck fuck­ing dick to make mon­ey.

–Rock­e­feller Cen­ter

Over­heard by: dank

Guy on cell: Take it like a bowl of dicks.

–14th & 5th

Over­heard by: John­ny Bon­san­to

Fat guy: So I asked her, and she gave me her num­ber, and then it was dis­con­nect­ed. So I went back the next week, and she was­n’t work­ing there any­more. So I won­dered, did she quit her job just to avoid suck­ing my dick?

–Bleeck­er & Sul­li­van

Over­heard by: Car­o­line