Father-of-the-year: My son. He came home with a swollen eye. I asked him why and he said another boy hit him. I asked him if he hit him back and he said, ‘No.’ I asked him why and he said, ‘Because that would hurt him.’ So I said, ‘He’s hurting you, isn’t he?’ So I told him to hit him back. That’s how the world is. Do you think when he starts going to school he’ll catch on?
–53rd & 6th
Hard hat meathead: Hey man, I haven’t seen you since that time you hit that guy in the face with a wrench!
–LIRR — Long Beach to Penn Station
Evander Childs graduate: Oh, you went to Spellman? I think I beat up a kid from Spellman.
–125th & Lenox
Angry man on cell: Tell her that if she walks in the wrong direction again, I am going to punch her in the fucking face!
Overheard by: Marissa
Guy: Dude, I’ve totally had girls ask me to give them bloody noses before sex.
–5th St between 1st & 2nd
Overheard by: MMS
Girl: There were these spiders on her so the guy she was with gave her a good beating all over.
Overheard by: arachnophile