Hobo: I need you to stop here. I need to get off and wash my pants. There has been a sex­u­al re­lease in my pants!

–Lenox Ave bus

Head­line by: Dan


· “And That’s Why I Was Late” — chron­i­cal­ly tardy

· “Bussed a Nut — Crosstown Ex­cite­ment Goes A Block Too Far” — Matt G.

· “Dis­hon­or­able Dis­charge” — Jim C.

· “Eco­nom­i­cal­ly and so­cial­ly dis­en­franchized peo­ple say the darn­d­est things” — Em­ma

· “MTA’s new “Re­quest-a-Stop” and hand­job fea­ture” — Jobee

· “Mar­vin Gaye’s re­tard­ed half-broth­er” — Mary Beth Han­lon

· “Mean­while, at the au­di­tions for ‘Speed III’ ” — shawn doney

· “Mil­ton Miss­es Yet An­oth­er Meet­ing of Pre­ma­ture Ejac­u­la­tors Anony­mous” — Tom Edi­ger

· “Nev­er ask a hobo if he’s com­ing or go­ing.” — La­dyP

· “Pre­ma­ture em­barka­tion” — mdub

· “Sec­ond Thought, Let’s Go For Two” — Mar­tin Frazee

· “Sen­a­tor Fo­ley just is­n’t the same when he’s not IM­ing” — oye

· “The Man On The Bus Goes Rub, Rub, Ooops…” — Sam Nas­sar

· “Why the 6 is nev­er on sched­ule” — Ri­onn Fears Malechem

Click here to see the new Head­line Con­test