Guy: Then I looked down at her and said, ‘Your bleached teeth are burning my dick!’
–Caliente Cab Co., Waverly & Green
Suit to female companion: You’ll stick your tongue up my ass, but you won’t share my toothbrush because of germs?!
–Renaissance Hotel, Times Square
Overheard by: Big Larry
Girl on cell: … So then he asked me to leave my toothbrush at his place, and I said no. And then he never called me again! I’m glad I didn’t leave my toothbush there.
Overheard by: joe d.
Guy on cell: … So I lost my job, and he brushed my teeth for six months.
–7th Ave, Park Slope
Young girl to mother pushing stroller: Oh, right, like I’ve never brushed her hair. Like I’ve never fed her or brushed her teeth. What the hell have you done for her?
–63rd & Lex
Overheard by: Jillian
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