Girl: And it’s, like, strike two. You’re to­tal­ly not get­ting a ba­by gift when I find out you’re preg­gers on Face­book.

–M23 bus

Suit on cell: My dad was mak­ing out with the nurse while I was be­ing born…

–Ful­ton St

Over­heard by: Miss Rach

Home­less la­dy: God’s preg­nant! He wants the city dead! God’s preg­nant!

–46th St & 5th Ave

Young boy pump­ing arms at sides and thrust­ing pelvis: Fer­til­ize me!

–Star­bucks