Old guy in group: So, I saw this spe­cial last night on haunt­ings, and there was this one seg­ment that re­mind­ed me so much of sto­ries my aunt used to tell us about grow­ing up in Brook­lyn. She says their house had a ghost that haunt­ed their at­tic and–
Young guy, in­ter­rupt­ing: –Oh, cool! Was it the kind of ghost that tips over fur­ni­ture and rat­tles tea cups, or the kind that flips you over in your sleep and rapes you up your ass?
Group: [Pal­pa­ble si­lence.]

–Cen­tral Park Lawn