Asian kid #1: That was your first shot and you didn’t even drink it.
Asian kid #2: I did drink it. It just took me a long time.
Asian kid #1: It’s your fucking birthday. You’re supposed to be unconscious. You should have done that shit. I bought that shot for you, man. If someone bought me a shot and I had had sixteen drinks, I would drink it anyway, just for the principle.

–9th street PATH Station