Girl: I can’t com­plain be­cause we’re not mar­ried — then I can com­plain all I want.

–Iron Sushi

14-year-old girl to mom: If you had mar­ried that oth­er guy I would have been so much taller!

–70th & Lex

Over­heard by: Eve­lyn

Hobo to by­stander: You’re gonna mar­ry a woman and not know she’s a gov­ern­ment agent? How re­tard­ed can you get?!

–Queens-bound V train

Chick: What you’re say­ing is, he could­n’t af­ford the waste­bas­ket so he got a wife?

–140th & Broad­way

Over­heard by: La­dle

20-ish chick on cell: I don’t care! He has chub­by fin­gers… I’m still not go­ing to mar­ry him.

–97th & Broad­way

Pro­fes­sor: Will you mar­ry me?! Your fa­ther is dead!

–NYU