Old lady tourist: Excuse me sir, do you know where the Chinatown is?
Flaming gay Asian guy: Yeah. It’s downtown. Just follow the smell, girl… Follow that smell!
–Canal St
Overheard by: InShock
Archive for the ‘Asians’ Category
At the Gape Pride Parade
Hispanic guy: I can’t believe it.
Southeast Asian guy: What?
Tan guy: Yeah, what?
Hispanic guy: How dilated my ass is!
Southeast Asian guy: I believe it — I was there.
–23rd & 9th
Overheard by: nate honeycut
Santa Finally Goes Legit
Asian kid: Why did you decide to start driving now?
Middle-aged thug: I drive trucks. Now it’s just time to tell the government.
–DMV, Atlantic Ave, Brooklyn
One Life to Wednesday One-Liner
Five-year-old boy to father: Is this an important life lesson?
–14th & 6th
Overheard by: A
Young Asian man to woman ignoring him: Hey, let’s go get a falafel. Hey, hey–you live around here often?
–Union Square
Overheard by: serena
Woman, throwing McNuggets at man: Get the fuck out of my life!
–Times Square
Overheard by: Elliot
Frantic crazy guy: I’m gonna go have a seat in Starbucks and get my life together!
–6th Ave & 25th St
Overheard by: tbomb
Suit on phone: Well that’s life, you screw people over and then you go to the Bahamas.
–Train into Penn Station
Holy Crap– That’s My Other Fetish!
African pedestrian, checking out hot Asian girl: Hello.
Hot Asian girl, listening to iPod: Hi. (looks at pedestrian quizzically)
African pedestrian: Konichiwa. (smiles creepily at her)
Hot Asian girl: No inglés. (looks back at her iPod)
–Penn Station
Overheard by: ABC
So why was she wearing a Chris Isaak t‑shirt?
Young Asian woman at a party on the Lower East Side: “…and it turns out that Chris Isaak asked me out only because he has an Asian fetish, and he’s apparently dated every Asian girl in San Francisco, I was creeped out…”
It’s the Mexico of Asia
Old white man: I didn’t know they had cockfights in Korea.
Young Asian guy: Yep, sure do.
–1 train
Like a Celibate Priest With a Huge Dick
Tipsy attractive Asian lesbian to girlfriend: Oh, well. Actually, I just learned how to deep throat in December… Pretty awesome, once you get it down.
Tipsy, equally attractive girlfriend: My last girlfriend said she used to do it, too! Wow, men must hate me.
–Uptown 1 Train
Hence Shonen Knife’s Tomato Head
Black chick: Hey, come here, look. Did you know that Asians can’t drink? Look at her face. It’s all red.
–Diesel, West Broadway
Fine, Get All Master Po on Me
Mom, in Chinese: One bubble tea.
Daughter: Why do you know Chinese?
Mom: Why don’t you?
–Main St
