Archive for the ‘Bag ladies’ Category

Wednesday One-liners Are Koo Koo

Hobo: Was it right to be kicked out of a house for being an adult with a child mind? You don’t get it, lady. There’s a whole house of adults with child minds. Whatever. See ya! Wouldn’t want to be ya! 

–F train

Queer: He totally has to understand that he’s crazy and that those Martha Stewart people are crazy too! 

–27th street office

Crazy lady: Well, I think you should give me my musical instruments back because I know that you’ve been stealing them every day for the last nine years. Yes, I’m sure! I have proof. You see, that’s not music. That’s not rock and roll. That’s just crazy.

–Bedford Avenue station

Overheard by: Greg Rutter 

Crazy man: I already told you I don’t have no chicken. Besides, I gave you that tree last week.

–54th & 11th

Crazy woman: I’ve got demons behind me, shit next to me, and the ugly ones in front of me. I need an angel above me.

–World Financial Center

Overheard by: Dr. Ballon 

Crazy bag lady: Stay away from the people! Stay away from the idiot Mexicans! 

–Union Square

Overheard by: Kaitlen 

Suit: …and I swear to God, man, the whole time? That creepy deaf-mute babysitter from across the hall?…is watching me.

–46th & 8th

Overheard by: ballpeen hammer 

Crazy lady: I don’t believe this. Pussyass son of a fucking faggot!

–Lexington & 23rd

Hobo: Would someone please tell Courtney Love to get her goddamned dick out of my mouth? Thank you! Would someone please tell Courtney Love to get her goddamned dick out of my mouth? Thank you! Would someone please tell Courtney Love to get her goddamned dick out of my mouth? Thank you! 

–19th between 7th & 8th

Don’t Give Me None of That “Light Through Yonder Breaks” Shit, Neither

Crazy bag lady on the l train: It is the winter of our discontent!
Ghetto girl #1: I dunno what you talkin’ bout. It’s content up in this motherfuckin’ winter. Maybe your ass would be contenter if you got a job.
Ghetto girl #2: Girl, shut up. You ain’t got no job either.

–L Train

Overheard by: ForniKate