Archive for the ‘Bimbettes’ Category

She’s Used to All That Pseu­do-Ital­ian Crap

Woman #1, point­ing to small­est cup: So, what size is this?
Barista: That’s a small.
Woman #1: And what size is this?
Barista: That’s a medi­um.
Woman #1: And so what size is this?
Barista: That’s a large.
Woman #2: Wow, this has been the most fas­ci­nat­ing ex­change I’ve heard in quite some time.

–9th St Espres­so, East Vil­lage

Over­heard by: Shanka­li­cious

Lit­tle Did He Know Her Cred­it Came With Ze­ro In­ter­est

His­pan­ic guy, not­ing hot chick passer­by: Hey, ba­by.
Hot chick: (rolls eyes)
His­pan­ic guy: (takes off shirt and puts it on the ground for her to walk over)
Hot chick, stop­ping: I’ll give you some cred­it for that one…but fuck off. (con­tin­ues walk­ing)

–50th & 9th

Over­heard by: passer­by

Head­line by: ddv

Run­ners-Up:
· “A Drama­ti­za­tion Of Citibank’s Cred­it Pro­to­col” — No­Cre­d­it
· “But…I Would Have Tak­en You to 4th Meal!” — Mad­dy
· “How Many Cred­its Do I Need to Save Up For a Blowjob?” — mark
· “It Was a Bad Day To For­get That He Was Wear­ing a Sports Bra” — Nick Pol­lot­ta
· “Matthew Mc­Conaugh­ey Fi­nal­ly Gets Some Cred.…” — Rain­danceRichard
· “Next Time He Won’t Give a Shirt” — Sim Etrias
· “Raleigh Gets the Old “Fuck Ye” From Eliz­a­beth Yet Again” — Lau­reen

Click here to see the new Head­line Con­test

Wednes­day One-Lin­ers’ Home­towns Were Glad to See Them Go

Brit la­dy, to MTA booth la­dy: Two adults, please. We’ll be get­ting off around 58th Street.

–14th St F sta­tion

Over­heard by: Fid­get

Tourist: Ex­cuse me, does the F train stop here?

–Sub­way sand­wich­es, Hous­ton & Lafayette

Tourist woman, loud­ly: Jeany? How many stops are we go­ing on this train?

–Times Square shut­tle

Over­heard by: nev­er­mind

Tourist: Ex­cuse me, which way is it to Up­per Town?

–Broad­way & Worth

Over­heard by: dukes

Tourist: Is this now the Grand Canyon of the East Coast?

–Ground Ze­ro

Tourist: My plane does­n’t leave for 4 hours. Can I walk to the Stat­ue of Lib­er­ty from here?

–La Guardia Air­port

Over­heard by: Jose Her­nan­dez

Tourist, lead­ing a group of more than a dozen fel­low tourists: Okay, I… um…don’t know where we are now…Oh, wait! Yes I do! We’re at the South Street Sea­port!

–Union Square

Blonde: Look, there’s the Chrysler. Look, there’s Times Square. Where’s the Em­pire State Build­ing?

–Top of Em­pire State Build­ing

Over­heard by: eng­lish­man in new york

Tourist, to deck hand: I can’t see the Stat­ue of Lib­er­ty. Would you please move the lifeboat out of the way while I take a pic­ture?

–Stat­en Is­land Fer­ry

Over­heard by: Steven Low­ell

Plus, We Both Like Ice Cream. And the Bea­t­les!

Bim­bo #1: Yeah, I re­al­ly think I like him. We get along so well. I mean, we have a lot in com­mon.
Bim­bo #2: Oh yeah? Like what?
Bim­bo #1: Well, we both love pugs.
Bim­bo #2: As in the type of dog? Every­one loves pugs. How can you not like pugs? They are so fuck­ing cute.
Bim­bo #1 (chal­leng­ing­ly): Yeah? Well, how about this one? Both of our dads died in plane crash­es.
Bim­bo #2: Oh. My. God. You are sooo meant to be to­geth­er.

–Brook­lyn Bound N Train

Over­heard by: totes meant to be