Archive for the ‘Brooklyn’ Category

I’m Glad We Had This Lit­tle Talk

12-year-old girl #1: Do you even like boys?
12-year-old girl #2: Yeah, I do!
12-year-old girl #1: Sure… You like them boys who be wearin’ all light col­ors, walkin’ around like, ‘How you doooin’? I’­ma braid your hair!‘
12-year-old girl #2: What? No. I like boys, I don’t like tit­ties.
12-year-old girl #1, af­ter a pause: Some boys be havin’ tit­ties, though.
12-year-old girl #2: Word.

–Gra­ham & Met­ro­pol­i­tan, Brook­lyn

Over­heard by: amused in the bus stop

Wednes­day One-lin­ers Join the Jet Set

South­ern woman on cell: I could not feel worse than I do right now…You will…Oh my god, they are gonna have to land that air­plane so you can vom­it.

–66th be­tween CPW and Colum­bus

Over­heard by: Char­lie

Dirt­bag: Man, I have to get over to Eu­rope. I got­ta sell a fuck­ing kid­ney.

–St. Mark’s Place

Man on cell: Yeah ba­by, yeah, I’m still in Lon­don. Yeah, I’ll be back on Wednes­day, ba­by.

–West 4th & Jane

Con­duc­tor: You’re now en­ter­ing the coun­try of Brook­lyn. Please have your pass­ports ready…

–F train

Over­heard by: Paul Eng

The Un­bear­able Light­ness Of Wednes­day One-Lin­ers

Rasta­far­i­an man to white bas­ket­ball fe­male play­er with dreads: Hey! Why you white peo­ple al­ways try­ing to look like me!

–Union Square

Black guy sell­ing Em­pire State Build­ing tick­ets: You’re from Scot­land? I love the Scots… They’re pu­u­u­u­u­u­ur­rreee white!

–Out­side Em­pire State Build­ing

Black woman to an­oth­er, about frat guys near­by: Man, white peo­ple are so loud.

–109th & Am­s­ter­dam

Over­heard by: Becks

Black hobo to white teen: Get out of this neigh­bor­hood with your white crotch! You don’t be­long here!

–Up­per West Side

Black woman to cops walk­ing away: But I’m a Cau­casian!

–Bed-Stuy

How Much Is That Wednes­day One-Lin­er in the Win­dow?

Man eat­ing brunch to male friend: We both came out sev­en years ago. We are pup­py gay in dog years.

–Big Dad­dy’s Din­er

Over­heard by: Mor­gan

Very lov­ing mom talk­ing to daugh­ter about her son: Hey! He is not an an­i­mal, he is not a dog. Well, at least not to­day!

–Hel­l’s Kitchen

Out­raged woman to man: What? No! Do not put the dog in the fur­nace, Ted!

–Court Street

Chick with cig­a­rette, on cell: … Leath­ery fetish dog-masks, or just Hal­loween style dog-masks?

–Out­side Tagine, 40th & 9th

Over­heard by: La­dle

Philo­soph­i­cal suit: The on­ly rea­son I haven’t di­vorced my wife is be­cause of the dog.

–Up­per East Side