Archive for the ‘Customers’ Category

GOD BLESS AMERICA

Chick: Ugh! These aren’t even cold! I can’t believe this! Who’s the manager? I said, who’s the manager? Well, where is he?
Deli guy: Uh, over there.
Chick: Look! Look at these drinks! How do you expect me to drink these? They aren’t even cold!
Manager guy: We just put them in there.
Chick: I don’t care! I want a cold drink now!
Manager guy: I’m sorry you’re upset but it’s very hot today and we’re selling drinks faster than we can restock them.
Chick: I don’t care! I expect you to find me something cold to drink!

–Marche Madison, 74th & Madison

Overheard by: sarahg

Chick on cell: So, when are you going to watch the fireworks? Like, in the evening? 

–Park Slope

Overheard by: Andy Travis 

Don’t Talk With Your Mouth Full

Middle-Aged man: I hope we don’t get caught.
Prostitute: Don’t worry, I never have.

–81st & Amsterdam
Headline by: Sean 

Runners-Up:
· “…Not Once in My Ten Years on the Force.” — Ingwall
· “Any Extra Charge For the Lip Service?” — Hobo Whisperer
· “He Was Looking For, ”Cause Then We’d Have to Be Punished…’ ” — alex
· “I’ve Got My Lucky Condom” — Sheri
· “Is Hugh Grant Considered ‘Middle-Aged’?” — Matthew McGuirl
· “My Parents Will Be Home in an Hour” — Lois
· “Skip the Condom. She’s Been Tested, Too” — Andy Adelewitz
· “Take Your Father to Work Day” — Sean Mc Grath

Honorable mentions:
· “Charge Me If You Can” — petch
· “If You Can’t Beat ‘Em (in Public)” — Heather
· “They Were Talking About Their Braces.” — Allison

Click here to see the new Headline Contest