Black girl #1: You look great. You are like wasting away from your fast.
Black girl #2: Thanks! I asked my brother the other day if I continued fasting after Lent ends, would that be considered a diet or just anorexia?
Black girl #3: Oh my god! I always want to do that.
Black girl #2: He said anorexia, but I'm still thinking about it.
–Town Hall, 43rd St
Overheard by: jesus would be so proud
Skinny girl in dress: Okay, what do you guys think?
Friend #1: Oh my god, it looks so good on you.
Friend #2: I love it!
Skinny girl: Really? I don’t know…
Friend #1: Seriously — you should get it. It looks awesome on you.
Friend #2: If I were you, I’d totally get it.
Skinny girl: Okay… Thanks! I think I will. [Retreats into fitting room.]Friend #1: God, she is so disgustingly skinny, it sickens me.
Friend #2: I could throw up right now.
–H&M fitting room, Broadway & Spring
Overheard by: lc
12-year-old girl: Mom, can we get a hot dog or something later?
Girl's mom: No, it'll make you fat.
12-year-old girl: But…
Girl's mom: Fat!
–F Train
Overheard by: Immallama
Crackhead to white girl: I want a little white girl. Okay, a little white lily, she so mad, I want a little white girl, not a black girl, they broke my heart too many times. You think I'm harassing you because you're white and I'm black.
Girl on train: I'm not white, okay? I'm not white, stop looking at me. I don't look remotely white, or Caucasian.
Crackhead: I'm not into fat girls, so I'll look somewhere else. I'm not into fat jokes, just black jokes. You probably think I'm into white guys, not white girls, just call me gay. Are you trying to slip away?
Girl on train: Did he just call me fat?
–Downtown 2 Train
Girl #1: Did you see Lisa’s London trip pictures?
Guy: No.
Girl #1: She actually had a double chin in some of the pics.
Girl #2: That’s great!
–Union Square
[Skinny girl takes box of equal out of her pocket and puts half the packages in her coffee.]Friend: What are you doing? You’re going to get cancer!
Equal girl: Yeah, but I won’t get fat.
–Starbucks
Woman: One grande caramel frappuccino with extra whipped cream, please.
Man: You know there’s six or seven hundred calories in that, right?
Woman: It’s not for me, it’s for my hamster. I swear.
–Starbucks, Bay Ridge
Overheard by: fion
Five thugs ascending subway steps see cop on the street: Ho! The pigs! Oink! Busted! [They run and one starts breathing heavily, wheezing.]Cop: Maybe you should have taken the elevator.
Fat thug: Shit! There’s an elevator?! Where’s the elevator?! [After they all go to look for the elevator] There’s no elevator! He tricked us!
–Lorimer St, Brooklyn
College guy #1: I've been working hard to lose weight this year.
College guy #2: I can certainly see the change in your face.
College guy #1: Yeah, I've been crapping a lot lately.
(college guy #2 is silent)
College guy #1: I mean I've been dumping a whole lot.
College guy #2: Okay, that's enough.
–Gym, Columbia University
Guy from restaurant to hobo: Hey, do you want something to drink?
Hobo: Sure, what do you have?
Guy from restaurant: Pepsi, Coke, Sprite…
Hobo: Anything diet?
–75th & Broadway
Overheard by: uneditedtales