Archive for the ‘Drag queens’ Category

In the Name Of the Fa­ther, the Son, and the Wednes­day One-Lin­er

Hus­band push­ing car­riage to wife: You’re lucky I’m on my way to church right now, or I’d kill you.

–Up­per West Side

Chick on cell: But the re­al ques­tion is, is he Catholic? And an in­som­ni­ac?

–113th & Broad­way

Over­heard by: Poo­gins

Se­quined Aus­tralian drag queen: Well, I know an An­tichrist re­li­gion when I see it.

–2nd St & 2nd Ave

Over­heard by: Al­isha

Girl on phone: He told me he was raped by a Catholic priest when he was lit­tle, but like I don’t be­lieve him.

–But­ler Li­brary, Co­lum­bia Uni­ver­si­ty

Train con­duc­tor: 110th Street, Cathe­dral Park­way. There are church­es here, you know.

–1 Train

Man to woman, af­ter get­ting off cell phone: Ah, that was Nancy–booty call. She says I got­ta get over there be­fore she’s got to go to church.

–Q Train

Over­heard by: spy­girl

Chris­t­ian Siri­ano: “Wednes­day Is a Hot One-Lin­er Mess”

Dis­co-glam drag queen: It was! It was ba­by oil, and I knew it!

–Rubu­lad, Bed-Stuy

Over­heard by: Katie

Black drag queen in ki­mono: I’m a corn pone South­ern fag­got, we do not do yo­ga.

–Tribeca

Over­heard by: Ryan K

Hys­ter­i­cal Lati­na trans­ves­tite: My life is in my ass, mi­jo!

–2 Train

Over­heard by: Jean

Drag queen hook­er to old­er la­dy star­ing at her: You so wish you could wear a one­sie like me.

–MTA

Who Wears the Pants in Your Wednes­day One-Lin­ers?

Old­er man: If you drank a thou­sand gal­lons of beer, and then took off your pants…

–79th & West End

Girl to guy with beavers on pants: Ex­cuse me, are those beavers on your pants?

–6 Train

20-some­thing prep­py girl on cell: When­ev­er I’m cheat­ing on my boyfriend, I take off my pants and pre­tend to be an al­bi­no bun­ny.

–Cen­tral Park

Over­heard by: that one girl

Guy on cell: If I don’t get in her pants tonight, I’m gonna fuck you up!

–1st Ave

Ag­ing drag queen to friend: It’s much bet­ter than sick ob­ses­sions with blond males be­tween the ages of 18 and 25 who al­ways take their pants off to play Game­Cube.

–The Vil­lage

Over­heard by: Amused NYU Tis­chie

Are You Washed in the Wednes­day One-Lin­ers Of Je­sus?

Teenage girl: My mom is al­ways re­mind­ing me to lock my door be­cause you got to wor­ry about the bloods and the clots.

–Up­town 2 Train

Emo chick: So he goes to this par­ty and he does it with this old guy. He pret­ty much went home with a bloody but­t­hole.

–Rose­land Ball­room

Over­heard by: char­lotte

Suit on cell: Nev­er in my life have I seen that much blood in the trunk of a car.

–82nd & 3rd

Over­heard by: Karyn

Small Asian girl to large drag queen: So then he, like, bit off his tongue and near­ly bled to death. (long pause) Or maybe I was just high.

–El­e­va­tor, Brook­lyn

The An­gel Wings Are for Re­li­gious Pur­pos­es

Drunk gay col­lege stu­dent, see­ing drag queens cross­ing the street: Yay! Hal­loween! I love Hal­loween!
Drunk col­lege friend: Oh my god! I love your cos­tumes!
Drag queen, an­gri­ly: It ain’t Hal­loween, bitch! This is every day!

–18th & 8th