Archive for the ‘Druggies’ Category

Wednesday One-Liners Choo-Choo-Choose You

Conductor: Attention downtown passengers. The train that just left the station was obviously not your train.

–6 Train

Woman on cell: Hey, it’s the MTA who should be spanked!

–Rector St.

Overheard by: Ladle

Small girl to mom: I like this train station the best because it has an elevator, and you can see the whole world outside. The whole wide beautiful world.

–Harlem Escalator, 1 Train

Overheard by: Mark Brinker

Guy: I get all my information from subway ads.

–F Train

Overheard by: Thom Cohen

Woman, hearing garbled announcement that E train is running as an F: No! They are takin’ all my E trains!

–E Train

Overheard by: I can has E train?

Crackhead: Make sure to take your newspapers with you on the way out of the train. I’m having company over later and I want it to look nice.

–Franklin Avenue Shuttle

Overheard by: shuttle rider

Happy Birthday, Mithras!

Red State Girl: Is that a hammer in your bag?
Dealer: Yeah. It’s a metaphor. ‘Cause Jesus was a carpenter, see. And I walk with Jesus.
Red State Girl: Oh.

–29th Street & 7th Ave.

Overheard by: M. Martin