Beautician #1: Do you smell burning hair?
Beautician #2: Maybe we’re walking too fast.
–3rd & MacDougall, the Village
Archive for the ‘Fitness’ Category
Gravitional Pull is an Involuntary Process
Guy #1: Dude, I hate fat chicks that are stuck up.
Guy #2: Yeah, it’s like, “Bitch, act your weight.”
–Office, 48th & 6th
There Are Two Types Of Girls in This World…
Perky trainer: Before we start the class, is there anyone with any injuries that I need to be aware of?
Chubby girl who smells vaguely of cigarettes: Does a hangover count?
–Equinox Gym, Upper West Side
Overheard by: Ladle
Someone’s Been Reading Men’s Health
Little boy: I have a six pack.
Little girl: What does that mean?
Little boy: It means I have big nipples.
–Broadway & 108th
Paris, Is That You?
Guy: So how come you were late today?
Girl: I really had to take a dump, otherwise my downward-facing dog was gonna be a non-housebroken one.
–Broadway & Houston
Overheard by: Daniel Motta
And Prickly
Mom: Let’s take the stairs, honey.
Thick daughter: Are you saying I’m fat?
–Rockefeller Center
Overheard by: Jason
Some People Have a Knack for Getting Right to the Heart of a Matter
White woman: How are things with John?
Asian woman: I don't know. He's just not manly enough for me. He listens to Miss Saigon at the gym. Maybe he has an Asian fetish.
White woman: Sounds more like he has a dick fetish.
–E Train
Overheard by: Brad
Especially the Grass-Stained Knees
Blond, after strenuous workout: God, I look like I just fucked the football team.
Blond friend: Guys like that look.
–Chelsea Piers
Overheard by: MtZ
You Look a Lot Different Vertical
Suit: Hey, Tom! Tom!
Tom: Hey there.
Suit: Nice to see you fully clothed for a change. (winks)
Tom (looks around, sees bystanders eavesdropping): Yeah, uh, (raises voice) See you at the gym, Dan. (turns around abruptly, hurries into building)
–53rd & 5th
Overheard by: YeahRightSuretheGym
Ask Him If He Wants to Go Steady
Hunky doorman #1 into his lapel mic: He wants to know how much you can bench press.
Listens for answer.
To hunky doorman #2: He says, “enough!”
–W Hotel, Park Avenue South
Overheard by: Sean