Archive for the ‘Girl-on-Girl’ Category

May/December Wednesday One-liners

Girl: Man, this old dyke is digging on me, but I want some penis
these days.

–3rd between B & C

Guy: Man, old pussy is the best! She has 50 years of dick sucking experience.

–124th & Manhattan

Overheard by: Jason Steinhauer

Queer on cell: Ever since I lost my hair I’ve had 20 year olds chasing me around like I’m an ice cream cone.

–LIRR

Overheard by: Squatporpoise

Girl: Oh yeah, that guy you saw me with Sunday? He lets me watch him have sex with boys.

–NYU School of social work

Overheard by: Maggie

Wednesday One-Liners Suck at Scrabble

Blonde: You know what I just learned? G-E-O-R-G isn’t pronounced ‘George’ — it’s pronounced ‘gay-something.’

–49th & Broadway

Overheard by: It’s too cold for stupidity

Fag hag to queer pal: It’s like, we’re like… cotillion-izing!

–Columbia University

Overheard by: jaded library dweller

Ghetto chick: Yo, he is datin’ Sheryl now. I told him, ‘Tell me when you kiss her.’ He was all, ‘Why?’ so I said, ‘So I know not to kiss her!’ I’m bilingual, yo.

–L train, 3rd Ave stop

Overheard by: katiebeans

Loud woman: That is ‘conniving’ with a capital ‘K’!

–St. Mark’s & 2nd Ave

Angry wife to husband: You are so patronistic. I seriously can’t stand how fucking patronistic you are.

–56th & 5th

15-year-old girl to group of friends: I be takin’ AP English this year, yo. I the only one in that motherfucker that don’t be lookin’ like they be deliverin’ yo’ egg rolls when they ain’ts in school an’ shit.

–210th St & Bainbridge Ave

Overheard by: gutterlush

Angry woman to friend: I have a contention with the way people pronounce my daughter’s name. I did not name my daughter ‘Lady Nasty’! I named my baby girl ‘La Dynasty.’

–JFK

Overheard by: The REAL Lady Nasty