Archive for the ‘Girls’ Category

Probably a Story There

California girl #1: I have, like, *no* gaydar.
California girl #2: You should!
California girl #1: I know!

–Gabby O’Hara’s, Midtown

Overheard by: AEC

Harold Is Dating the Only Girl in NYC Who’s Aroused by That

Girl: So, can you beatbox?
Guy: No, but I can make elephant noises. [Makes elephant noises.]

–Savoia

Shouldn’t We Be Dancing on a Bar Somewhere?

Girl #1: I feel weird today.
Girl #2: Me too.
Girl #1: I feel like I’m single again.
Girl #2 (squealing excitedly): Me too!

–N Train

Overheard by: sara n.

Ashley, We’re White!

Thuggette to random Latina girl: That’s right, keep walkin’ bitch! I’ll throw yo’ ass in the trash right ’bout now!
Thug: Can’t we act civilized just for like, five minutes?
Thuggette: Fuck you, nigga!

–Times Square Subway Station

Overheard by: Tim

And I’ve Always Thought It Was Important to Have a Strong Sense Of Where I’m Going in Life

Girl #1: Yeah, we’re engaged. He got me the ring and all, but I’m like, “it’s going to be like ten years until we actually get married.“
Girl #2: Oh, true.
Girl #1: I need to drop pre-calculus. It’s too hard and it’s going to lower my GPS.

–Uptown E Train

Overheard by: Nicole Yan

This Is Why You Don’t Rob Banks with Family

Girl to mother: You’re being really obvious, mom, and I don’t need obvious right now.

–W 242nd St

Mary Magdalene Was a Preppy Asian Chick?

Preppy Asian girl #1: Look! The crazy religious people gave me a key chain.
Preppy Asian girl #2: What’s it say?
Preppy Asian girl #1: That I’m number one with Jesus.
Preppy Asian girl #2: I don’t think Jesus will appreciate the fact that you’re a slut.

–N Train

Sweet or Salty?

Queer #1: I sucked you off and swallowed your cum!
Queer #2: Shh, not now, someone will hear.
Queer #1: No! No one is listening!
Girl next to them: Actually, I’m listening.

–3 Train

Overheard by: Carly