Archive for the ‘Google’ Category

She Is So Going To Regret Being Named Scat Now

Twentysomething woman to friends: Yeah, I was thinking I should really google myself too, so I can finally like…
Friend: See what you do?
Twentysomething woman: Yeah!

–122nd, between Broadway and Amsterdam

Overheard by: amarg

Headline by: Del

Runners-Up:
· “Debbie From Dallas Will Be in For a Shock…” – BareNakedLady
· “Google: Solving Existential Crises Since 1998” – Ely Henry
· “Put a Towel Down First” – Kevin P
· “Stacy Finds Out What All Those Little Blinking Red Lights in Her Boyfriend’s Bedroom Were All About.” – danielle
· “Vanity, Thy Name Is Google!” – fester60613

Click here to see the new Headline Contest

Superpoke! Wednesday Has Thrown a One-Liner at You!

Frustrated stylist on computer: How do you spell "Google"?

–Dramatics Hair Salon

Hot Asian woman: She hasn't even posted her face on Facebook!

–88th & 2nd

Overheard by: Sam H.

Teen to friend: My mom still hasn't Facebooked me back about taking care of my dog.

–Bedford Ave

Overheard by: kayt

Sorority girl: Like…oh my god. We should write about ourselves on Juicy Campus and see what other people say.

–Classroom, NYU

Overheard by: Angela

Middle-aged janitor: You've got to try that internet! It has everything!

–MoMA

Overheard by: Cristina

Wednesday One-Liners Wear Heels in Bed

Obnoxious NYU student on phone: Hey, remember that cute boy in my chemistry class I was telling you about? Well, I totally just saw him in a gay porno!

–Study Room, NYU Dorm

Overheard by: NYU Ears

Patient woman: She's making friends with an old porn star, leave her alone!

–2nd Ave b/w 50th & 51st

Overheard by: sab

Cranky suit to nodding friend: Except for porn and eBay, no one knows how to make money anymore!

–Madison Ave & 47th St

Overheard by: kricka

Girl to friend: This would be a great place to shoot a porno.

–Downstairs Bar, Morimoto Restaurant

iPhone screamer: Yeah, just take the exec-u-table file and put it in the folder. Right the exec-u-table file! I know, the music is funny, like a porno, right?

–33rd St b/w 5th & 6th

Chick: You *know* we're all going to be googling "eggbeater porn" before the night is over.

–Party, 171st & Broadway

Overheard by: Ladle

Wednesday One-Liners Click “It’s Complicated”

Chick: It’s about your cyber personality, and if your cyber personality doesn’t want to be in a relationship with me on Facebook, that’s okay!

–NYU Hayden Staircase

Coed: I don’t know… if Sheryl* with the two kids by the two different baby-daddies can have a good MySpace, I think pretty much anyone should be able to do it.

–Hunter College

Overheard by: ImmaculatePizza

Hipster girl: It looks like MySpace exploded in there!

–The Knitting Factory, 74 Leonard St

Overheard by: Cassie

20-something girl: So, the quadriplegic I hooked up with added me as a friend on Facebook last night.

–Chipotle, 51st & 8th

Geek prophet: No one is ever away from Google, really.

–Near Holland Tunnel

Overheard by: Claire H.

Angry chick, to boyfriend: Look, I’m not changing my Facebook status!

–6th & Ave A

Overheard by: Kremilyse

30-ish woman: I said I wouldn’t date him ’til he gets rid of the typos on his MySpace profile… Am I a snob?

–Tom’s Diner, Morningside Heights

Overheard by: ball-and-veining tool

Wednesday One-Liners Want You to Know About the Size of Their Bank Accounts

Yuppie on cell (trying to be discreet): Hey mom. Are you busy? Could you Google Maps me? I'm on Houston and West Broadway. Yeah, I didn't want to ask anyone for directions and make a fool of myself. Although I'm pretty sure I just did, because half of this coffee shop is looking at me now.

–W Houston

Overheard by: Let's face it, we were all new at one point.

40-something yuppie woman: And then I realized that my biggest problem in life is that most of the time I'm incredibly happy, but I'm not aware of how happy I am.

–81st & Madison

Yuppie dad to seven-year-old daughter: Now when you start buying iPods, that's when you're going to want to have a Visa card.

–Stanton & Christie

Overheard by: Ross

Three-year-old yuppie spawn: Noooooooooooo! I don't want Pad Thai! I want sushi!

–Dice Thai, Prospect Park

Overheard by: I'll take sushi too but you're payin', kid

And Now You Expect Me to Walk??

Girlfriend, exiting cafe: I told you you should have googled this place before we drove all the way here!
Boyfriend: I'm sorry. Let's just go into the city! Bars are open until five there!
Girlfriend: You couldn't entertain me in Brooklyn for half an hour. What are you going to do with me in the city until five?
Boyfriend: Walk up and down the city streets!

–Bedford Ave & 6th St