Archive for the ‘Grocery Stores’ Category

And Now He’s Got My Vote

Girl #1: So how did you meet him?
Girl #2: He just came up to me on the street and asked me my name… Then he asked me if I want­ed to get a drink, so I took him to the bar every­one was at.
Girl #1: Then what hap­pened?
Girl #2: Then we fucked.
Girl #1: What? Just like that?
Girl #2: Yeah, I can hard­ly re­mem­ber, but we left the bar, grabbed a cab, went to my dorm and then we fucked.

–CVS, 9th & 58th

…As Our High School Hon­ors Project.

Guy #1: Af­ter Jim moved to River­head, he does­n’t come out to the city any­more to hang out.
Guy #2: Fuck those Long Is­land peo­ple. Fuck ’em. Let those Mer­cedes-dri­ving ass­holes go to Roo­sevelt Field Mall and climb that fuckin’ rock wall for fun while we get drunk and bang bitch­es un­der the 59th St bridge.

–Out­side Ma­cy’s, Her­ald Square

Wednes­day One-Lin­ers Ride a Ves­pa

Hip­ster on cell: I’m not even buy­ing any­thing. I’m just here to be seen.

–Trad­er Joe’s

Hip­ster boy: I loves me some mas­ter race!

–Lob­by, the Met

Over­heard by: Shay­na

Tip­sy hip­ster girl: Wine is so, like, the blood of the gods!

–W 4th & Christo­pher St

Hip­ster guy: I think the most tru­ly good per­son who’s ever been on this earth was Gand­hi. Or maybe Mar­tin Luther King, Ju­nior… But he was black.

–Times Square

Over­heard by: Ghan­di was In­di­an..

Drunk chick: What kind of hip­sters are you that you won’t fuck a girl just be­cause she wants to wear a Sailor Moon cos­tume?

–St. Mark’s Pl

Good Luck Ex­plain­ing This to the E.R. Doc, Wednes­day One-Lin­er

Ghet­to la­dy on phone wait­ing for bus: Ugh. I’m ex­haust­ed. I don’t have the en­er­gy to stick my hands up your ass.

–Hunts Point

Dude on cell: I think he’s the same guy who stuck the jar up his ass. (pause) Well, be­cause the cam­era an­gle was the same, and the scar…

–108th & Broad­way

Over­heard by: La­dle

Drunk gay man speak­ing to straight cou­ple: So I’m at the wed­ding talk­ing to my fu­ture cousin-in-law about how it’s not gay if he likes things in his ass, and he said that’s not his prob­lem, his prob­lem is ask­ing her to cut her fin­ger­nails.

–26th b/w 9th & 10th

Fe­male suit on cell: There was some­thing go­ing in­to that butt, did I not men­tion that?

–10th & Hud­son