Archive for the ‘Hippies’ Category

Jurassic Wednesday One-Liners

College guy: These are the best dinosaurs I've eaten all day!

–Fordham University, Lincoln Center Campus

Ecstatic five-year-old girl: The dinosaurs! I can't wait to see the dinosaurs!

–Metropolitan Museum of Art

Overheard by: Miss Guided

Hippie girl: Yeah, I don't know about the eyeballs, but the dinosaurs are great!

–39th St & 8th Ave

Overheard by: Natalie

Girl on stoop: Yo, man, I wish our dinosaurs could talk.

–St. Mark's & 3rd

Overheard by: Anna P.

Girl on cell: Because–you know what? Because I don't etch on my DVDs with pterodactyls!

–Court Street, Brooklyn Heights

Overheard by: Danielle

Guy rooting through trash: If you were a dinosaur I'd be a dinosaur right beside you.

–W 80th & Amsterdam

Wednesday One-Liners Love the Skin They're In

Skinny pale male hippie with hair in top knot, to friend, calmly: I'm going to lose my brain. A piece of my brain.

–E.11th St & 5th Ave

Overheard by: Liz

Man on cell: Yeah, he crossed the line. Then, when he started talking about my wife's anatomy I was just disgusted.

–31st Parking Garage

Thug, about his baby son: So, I'm lookin' at this kid. I be lookin' at him real hard. He got everything I got! Square head, the shoulders, the flat feet, everything! Straight down to the penis!

–Staten Island Ferry

Out of towner to friend: I just want to let you know your armpit is making my wrist very warm right now.

–3 Train

Overheard by: there are worse places you could put that, I guess…

Man to friends: He empties his mind into your face.

–5th Ave & 11th St

California's Almost Far Enough

Hippie woman: Ma'am, what did you just feed my dog?
Elderly woman: A treat.
Hippie woman: What was it? Was it meat?
Elderly woman: Well, not really, it was a sausage.
Hippie woman: What is wrong with you?! My dog is a vegetarian! What if he had a food allergy?!
Elderly woman: Right. Go away.

–Thompson Square Park Dog Run

Overheard by: Klayton

But Here's a Really Cute One of Him with a Pitchfork and Little Tail

Middle-aged Republican lady: Do you have any McCain buttons?
Hippie political button vendor: Only this one (shows her “make war, not love” button). It's about how all Republicans think that wars are the most important thing ever.
Middle-aged Republican lady: So, you don't have any nice McCain buttons?
Hippie political button vendor: Do I look like I have any nice McCain buttons?
Middle-aged Republican lady: (long pause) No.

–Outside Central Park

Overheard by: iz