Archive for the ‘Infidelity’ Category

More Like Fisting Them, Really

Latina: You like to dance?
Preppy guy: Yeah.
Latina: The girls here are really easy. I can introduce you to some that will let you touch their pussies.
Preppy guy: Ummm. I’m engaged.
Latina: That’s okay. My husband’s over there dancing with them right now.

–Eldridge St

Overheard by: David

Nobody Calls ’em “Playerettes”

Black man #1: Man, that reminds me of my bachelor party! The other day this slut friend of mine was getting married — excuse my language.
Black man #2: That’s aight, man. Sometimes you gotta call a slut a slut.
Black man #1: So, she was getting married, right? And the guy is waiting for her in a hotel room with champagne and shit. And the bitch is at my house!
Black man #2: Yo, that’s a slut aight.

–28th & 8th

Poli-Sci 101: Clintonian Etiquette

Columbia girl #1: So wait, he cheated on his mistress??
Columbia girl #2: Nooooo, he cheated on his wife with his mistress.
Columbia girl #1: Oh, I was confused.

–116th & Amsterdam
Headline by: nj2nc

Runners-Up:
· “And by ‘Confused’ I Mean Impressed” – colleen
· “Apparently, So Was the Admissions Staff” – goes to a better NY school
· “He Did Cheat on Both with a Hooker in Vegas, But That Stayed There.” – Deborah
· “It’s OK, Extra-Marital Affairs Is a 300-Level Course.” – Tyson Jurgens
· “It’s a Mobius Strip of Poon.” – prefekt
· “Just as Long as There Weren’t No Damn Queers Getting Hitched. That Would Ruin the Holy Union That Is Marriage.” – Colin McCleod
· “Most Likely to Transfer to a SUNY” – lascouine
· “Professor Giuliani Should Remove His Bio from the Syllabus” – Dave Ellis
· “Shouldn’t be. It’s How You Got into Columbia.” – abby
· “So How Did the Monkey Fit into All of This Again?” – Fleetline
· “You Better Start Learning the Difference If You’re Going to Get That MRS Degree” – SlickRicks
· “You Can’t Cheat on the People You Are Cheating on Your Wife With…It’s in the Bible.” – Sean
· “You’d Think the Concept of Cheating Would Be More Familiar at Columbia” – bri b

Click here to see the new Headline Contest

Ever Get the Sense That Every Day Is Like an Episode Of Springer?

Tall, gorgeous girl to much shorter, uglier boyfriend: Why do you need to know were I was last night? I thought you said our relationship was all about trust!
Boyfriend: I'm your boyfriend! I have a right to know where you were and who you were with!
(as they stop walking and argue loudly, a small crowd begins to gather)
Tall girl: Do you thing I was cheating? Why would you think that? You're the one that said you're the only one that will ever love me!
(crowd boos boyfriend)
Boyfriend: I am the only man that will ever love you!
Random guy in crowd: I love you!
Boyfriend: You love me?
Random guy: No you douchebag, your girlfriend!

–Broadway & Wall St.