Archive for the ‘Koreans’ Category

Wednesday One-Liners With Leather Patches on Their Elbows

Professor, matter of factly: In next week’s film you will see a cock. And it will ejaculate. I hope that’s okay with you all.

–Cantor Film Center, NYU

Professor: I guess I can’t trust you guys to write papers on something scandalous. Good thing I brought a pornographic film for later.

–Manhattan Campus, Pratt Institute

Overheard by: Norma Desmond

Contracts professor: So do you think Paris Hilton is a sucker?

–Brooklyn Law School

Professor to class, as he writes on board: …Moro Islamic Liberation Front, known for its acronym. [A few students get it and laugh.] 

–Fordham University, Rose Hill

Overheard by: Krisztina one of the first to laugh

Professor: On this index card I’d like you all to write your name and major, as well as your career fantasies. I say career fantasies because when you graduate I’ll see you paying off your loans working at the kwik-e-mart.

–St. John’s University

Overheard by: Erum

Korean professor: Here’s how you calculate the intercept shit…


English professor: You will find that English critical theory is the key to understanding not only literary perspectives, but also everything on YouTube.

–Fordham University

Overheard by: sromeo

The Part Where They Have Manners?

Latina chick, in Spanish, after Korean tourist trips into her: Listen, you son of a bitch — don’t touch me, you faggot! You get me, asshole?!
Friend: Haha, babe, like this asshole understands what you’re saying?
Korean tourist, in Spanish: I lived in Puerto Rico for two years.
Latina chick, in English: Oh, word? What part?

–A train

Overheard by: Graham Davis

Boy Have a Penis; Girls Have Wednesday One-liners

Chick: I swear to god, I don’t know how nothing has happened to me yet, either I am infertile or the cure for herpes is in my vagina.

–6 train

Overheard by: brynn

Man on cell: Hey, baby. It’s sure hot out today…you better get out those hot pants…I mean hot shorts…your pussy must be burning up.

–56th & Broadway

Businesswoman on cell: Aw, man. If only she were a hermaphrodite! Damn!

–7th & Perry

Korean dude: Are you suggesting that you have a super dope vagina?

–Camel, W. 33rd Street

Overheard by: Dave Min

Man: We’re going to have a tampon fondue!

–Duane Reade, Bay Ridge

Overheard by: molina1230

At Least We Know the Korean Guy Doesn’t Hate Chinese People

2 Black teens sit at a table together, comparing the shopping they’ve just done. One gets up to ask for a cigarette from a middle-aged Asian dude sitting nearby. The Asian dude ignores the teen.

Black teen #1: Man, I hate Chinese people.
Black teen #2: Yo son, watch what you’re saying. Look around you.
Black teen #1: I don’t give a shit, man! I fucking hate
Chinese people.
Black teen #2: Besides, I’m pretty sure they’re Korean.

–Greenstreets, 32nd & Broadway

Overheard by: enkie