Archive for the ‘Magic’ Category

Wednesday One-Liners Are So Fucking Glad It’s Over

Conductor: This is Prince Street. Not Half-blood Prince Street, but Prince Street.

–N train

Overheard by: she later invited the passengers to debate whether snape was a criminal or a hero

30-year old fan: … And then he sprinkled magic dust over her throbbing vagina…

–Book release, Spring & Mercer

Overheard by: santos l. halper

Man to five-year-old son: Yeah, you know Harry Potter is now in this play in London where he plays a naked guy that has sex with horses? Comin’ to Broadway soon.

–Harry Potter Pl on Mercer St

Overheard by: i don’t THINK that’s how it goes actually…

Girl glancing at boy reading Deathly Hallows: Does Frodo die?

–Strings Attached Theater Company’s performance of Life As We Know It

What Is Art? Are We Art? Are Wednesday One-Liners Art?

Older gay guy on cell: In the 60s, you didn’t need to have passion or talent to be an artist; you just needed to have a van, because no one else was going to haul your shitty art around.

–7th Ave & 14th St

Overheard by: Miss C

Girl reading sign at Frank Lloyd Wright museum: Oh… He was an architect!

–Guggenheim Museum

Overheard by: Antartic

Mom to little girl: If you look at too much art in one day, you’ll turn into a statue.

–MoMA

Guy on phone: Yeah, she said she didn’t think I would want to go, but why the fuck not? I’ll go to a fucking museum if I fucking want to. I’ll look at some paintings and shit.

–Downtown Brooklyn

Overheard by: Mark McLaughlin

12-year-old boy, looking at Picasso paintings: This is totally my thing, man, it’s like free porn.

–MoMA

Wednesday One-Liners: Fact or Fiction?

Guy: It’s like August: Osage County, but with zombies.

–Manhattan Theatre Source

Overheard by: Emily B.

Girl: You know what they say: two in the bush, one in the wizard.

–Dorm, Pratt Institute

College student: Ghosts? They’re like VT!

–186th St & Amsterdam

Black female suit on cell: Yeah, well you betta hope Tinkabell comes along… Or whoever the fuck it is who grants you ya damn wishes!

–Penn Station

Overheard by: emily d.

Annoyed man on cell walking down stairs: No, mom, I don’t know what werewolves eat! No, mom, I don’t! Mom, I can’t talk right now, I’m going into the subway!

–Union Square Subway Entrance

Overheard by: Masked Avenger

Why Stephen Hawking Retired: Explained

Chulo #1: What sign are you?
Chula: Aries. You?
Chulo #2: Asshole. That’s his sign: asshole.
Chulo #1: Naw, man. It’s cancer.
Chulo #2: Why do so many people believe in that astrology shit?
Chulo #1: Because it’s true!
Chula: It’s so true. I’ve got all the personality traits. Like, I think I know everything. I get along real well with Leos, we’re all bossy together. What sign are you?
Chulo #2: Scorpio.
(chula and chulo #1 laugh knowingly)
Chula: Oh, yeah, you know what that means. You’re a lover.
Chulo #2: Ha ha, yeah?
Chula: You see someone and like that, you’re in love. And then, two weeks later, you don’t want nothing to do with her.
Chulo #2: Um… No… I mean, not really…
Chulo #1: Yeah, man, it’s all true. Written in the stars.

–Downtown A Train

Overheard by: Rose Fox