Archive for the ‘Manhattan’ Category

At Least She’s Read­ing

Ghet­to chick: Ex­cuse me! Ex­cuse me! What’s the name of the tow­ers that got knocked down?
In­cred­u­lous passer­by: Umm … The World Trade Cen­ter.
Ghet­to chick to thug boyfriend: See! I told you it was­n’t none of that twin tow­ers. You think­ing of Lord of the Rings.

–Vesey St

Of Course, I Missed Like Every Sci­ence Class Ever

Hip­ster girl: Gosh, I’m like Pavlov’s dog!
Guy: What the hell is that?
Hip­ster girl: You don’t know? They teach it in, like, every sci­ence class ever!
Guy: So, what is it?
Hip­ster girl: It has some­thing to do with bells and drool, I’m not re­al­ly sure.

–Wash­ing­ton Square Park

Over­heard by: Tres Chic

Trans­la­tion: She Went Up 2 Cup Sizes

Chick #1: So yeah, all this time I’ve nev­er had PMS be­fore. Like ever. Now that all this hor­mon­al shit is go­ing on, it all caught up with me this past week.
Chick #2: What do you mean?
Chick #1: I’ve been eat­ing M&M’s, Fritos, choco­late-cov­ered pret­zels, and Pow­er­ade this en­tire week, and I can’t go 10 min­utes with­out cry­ing.
Chick #2: Are you prego?
Chick #1: No, I think I just fuck­ing won the en­docrine lot­tery.

–Times Square shut­tle

Over­heard by: Glyn­nis O

NY1 Top Sto­ry: Child Pro­tec­tion Ser­vices Tak­en Over by MTA

Voice over PA, as train is pulling out of the sta­tion: How you gonna let your child run around like that? You call your­self a moth­er? I could’ve closed the doors on your child and then what? You would’ve been all sad and shit but I was nice, I chose to keep the doors open. You call your­self a moth­er… let­tin’ your child run around on the sub­way…

–1 train

Over­heard by: LSB