Archive for the ‘Multiculturalism, Overheard Style’ Category

Maybe That Worked on Your Mor­mon Girl­friend

Skin­ny white guy: I’m like, re­al­ly ex­cit­ed for that Is­rael pa­rade. Like, I think it will be a re­al­ly nice ex­pe­ri­ence for me.
Jew­ish girl: Mmh­mm.
Skin­ny white guy: No, I’m se­ri­ous. I love Jews. And like, I’m not just say­ing it to get in­to your pants.

–Penn Sta­tion

And, by the Way, ‘Gram­mat­i­cal­ly Cor­rect­ly’ Is Need­less­ly Re­dun­dant

Bel­liger­ent white woman: Could you get of the way?
Black teen: I be try­ing!
Bel­liger­ent white woman: You should speak gra­mat­i­cal­ly cor­rect­ly!
Smar­tass: “I be try­ing” is­n’t un­gram­mat­i­cal. It’s stan­dard us­age in African-Amer­i­can ver­nac­u­lar Eng­lish.
Bel­liger­ent white woman: Oh, what would you know?
Smar­tass: I have a Ph.D. in lin­guis­tics from MIT.

–A train

Next Time Im­pede the In­ves­ti­ga­tion in Finnish

[Pa­trol car flash­ing lights at curb. Small group of high-school­ers cor­ralled against wall]Police of­fi­cer: So what hap­pened –what did you see?
Sharp teen: No hablo in­glés.
Of­fi­cer, in per­fect Span­ish: En­tonces, que pasó? Qué viste?
Smart teen: No hablo es­pañol!

–85th & Am­s­ter­dam

Over­heard by: Christo­pher Stone