Conductor: The next stop is…155th Street.
–Uptown D train, 170th St
Overheard by: Jess McGins
Conductor, over radio: Hey, Steve, do we have to fill out an unusual occurrence report for being on time?
–Amtrak train out of Penn Station
Overheard by: Mike
Conductor: This is a downtown 4 train making local stops. I repeat, this…Stop looking at me like that, nigga, or I’ll kill yo’ ass…This is a downtown 4 train making local stops…
–Downtown 4 train
Conductor, over loudspeaker: Come on! Step on the train. Don’t just look at the doors. Walk on!
Overheard by: Lila
Conducter: This is the back! This is the back of the train! The back, as in not the front!
–NJ Transit train, Penn Station
Overheard by: stupid tourist
Conductor: This is South Orange. South Orange. South Orange. [sound of a group of people cheering is heard over the speaker] Hallelujah! Hallelujah! This is South Orange!
–NJ Transit train from Penn Station to Dover
Conductor: We’re being held up by a C train in front of us. If you’re nervous or scared, we’ll be moving to our destination in a moment. No worries!
–Uptown A train
Overheard by: wasn’t too worried