Archive for the ‘Overheard Overheard’ Category

Wanna Buy a Bridge, Wednesday One-Liners?

10-year-old tourist kid: Mom, is Brooklyn famous for its graffiti?

–Coney Island-bound D train

Overheard by: BB

White guy, pointing: Over there in Brooklyn three-year-olds just, like, walk around!

–Delancey & Essex

Overheard by: Red Hair

Guy walking through bar: What’s with Brooklyn and beards?

–Union Hall, Park Slope

Overheard by: jasonjason

Guy: Brooklyn is the middle borough in terms of goodness.

–Kosher Delight

Thugette to double decker tour bus: Brooklyn! Brooklyn! You’re taking a tour of Brooklyn! I just got out of jail!


Overheard by: Staying on the bus….

I, Uh… Know?

Male hockey fan: I swear — if he shows me his ass one more time…
Female hockey fan: I know!
Male hockey fan: Seriously, I’ve seen the inside of his colon.

–33rd & 7th

Headline by: Rhys Southan

· “And Trust Me, It’s Not All It’s Cracked Up to Be” – Mike N
· “But I Had to Pay Extra” – Anna
· “Giuliani’s Clean Bill Of Health Proves Not to Be Factor with Voters” – Jatmos
· “Now Let’s Take Off These Rubber Gloves and Go to the Game” – Julie

Click here to see the new Headline Contest

But Thanks Anyway for Paying to Have the Teeth in My Vagina Straightened

20-something girl, bawling: It’s not funny! I turn boys gay, Dad.

–Aroma Cafe

Headline by: shudder

· “A Father’s Dream Comes True” – 6th Floor Blogger
· “Put Other Daddy on the Phone!” – KJM
· “There Are No Strap-Ons Without Consequences” – Captain Hetero
· “There, There, Liza. It’ll Be Okay.” – Howard Bannister
· “Worst Super Power Ever” – Cricket

Click here to see the new Headline Contest

Always Complaining About Wednesday One-liners

Lady: I don’t like to parallel park…it messes up my hair.

–61st & Madison

Guy: Seriously, you are being ridiculous. You need to calm the fuck down. You still have 2 more stops and what are your expectations with that outfit? Let me off.

–L train

Man on cell: I served lemonade for 6 hours! It wasn’t fucking bartending! It sucked!

–61st & 3rd

Chinese chick: Oh, I don’t watch baseball. I just recently found out what a home run is. I used to think they would, like, run home, and I was like, what the fuck is the point of that?

–B6 bus

Man on cell: Are you a fucking retard or do you just play one in real life?

–Penn Station

Girl: I don’t know why I pay for the internet. The only sites I ever use are Friendster, Craigslist and Overheard In New York and I’ll be honest, sometimes they just don’t do it for me.

–2 train

Punk chick: …hate it when my dirt washes off. It keeps me warm.

–St. Mark’s between 1st & A

Chick: You’re not the one who had to teach a fucking dance class from 9 to 5. I had to teach dance from 9 to 5. And I have to do it again tomorrow. I don’t wanna fucking dance anymore. I have tendonitis!

–12th & 3rd

Overheard by: Domi & Rachel

Listen to Preppy; He Knows What He’s Talking About

Flaming queer: What you whiteboys don’t realize is that the foreskin is not a chew toy. Maybe a little biting is OK, but don’t go down on it like a stick of Trident.
Preppy queer: This is totally going to end up on Overheard if you don’t quiet down.
Flaming queer: I’m Puerto Rican; we’re a loud people. It’s all of the drums.

–Candle Bar, Amsterdam Avenue