Professor: Skeet is when a man pulls out of the vagina or anus and has an orgasm on the man or woman. It’s also come to refer to the ejaculate itself.
–NYU classroom
Woman on cell: Nice. I just realized I’ve been wandering around with doughnut glaze stuck to my cheek like dried cum.
–44th & 8th
Sex ed teacher: The penis can’t urinate and, um, spermate at the same time.
–Berkeley Carroll School, Park Slope
Overheard by: i believe it’s ejaculate
Man on cell: I hired you to be a fucking porn director, not to make some artsy documentary! I mean, she’s supposed to get that on her face!
–Times Square
Woman to her Grizzly Adams-like companion: But, honey, you don’t have any sperm!
–Penn Station
Overheard by: Marissa
Guy on cell: Yeah, I called the sperm bank and told them your test came back positive… Yeah, they said it was no big deal.
–114th & Amsterdam
Dude on cell: I just ordered some soup and am drinking tea, so we’re on the same page. Except about cum, it seems.
–Office, Midtown
Overheard by: Argopelter
