Archive for the ‘Queer guys’ Category

Roe vs. Wednesday One-Liners

Guy, selling comedy tickets: Come on, guys, see the show! It’s cheaper than a Chinese abortion.

–Times Square

Kid: You may think of abortion like, "Oh, it’s gone!"

–Washington Square Park

Overheard by: Emilia

Girl: Now I understand why people steal babies! It totally makes sense! We should legalize abortion.

–68th St & 1st Ave

Overheard by: Manic Mouse

Queer on phone: No, I’ve told you. I’m atheist, I don’t want to go to church with you. Well, I dunno what to tell you, mother, it’s too late for an abortion now. Maybe you should have used a condom.

–CVS , Cedarhurst, Long Island

Overheard by: Queer CVS clerk

Guy: So, she starts talking about abortion while I got a fuckin’ boner and I’m like, "Are you fucking kidding me?"

–W 42nd St & 8th Ave

Can We at Least Agree That Two Whites Don't Make a Wong?

Highly agitated gay man, bleach-blond, indeterminately biracial: My mother was black! She died in 1999!
Middle aged black woman: Now, wait a second…
Highly agitated gay man: My mother was black and my father was Chinese!
Middle aged black woman: Now, you just don't worry about them…
Highly agitated gay man: If I'm white, it's because my black mother was white!
Middle aged black woman: Now you're just bein' crazy.

–Prospect Park, Brooklyn

Overheard by: MPW

…We Can at Least Make This an Educational Experience.

Adopted boy on PlayStation to gay father: Why can't we just get on this next bus?
Gay father: Noah, I told you, this bus doesn't go to where we want to go. Do you want to go stay at someone else's house? (under his breath) I'd like to send you to someone else's house…
Adopted boy: Ugh, well, how long do we have to wait?
Gay father: Until the next bus! C'mon, let's go wait in Hooters.

–Hampton Jitney, Queens

Overheard by: sarah