Archive for the ‘Rednecks’ Category

If by “Discount Shopping” You Mean “Anonymous Barebacking”

Young girl with Texan accent #1: What’s Soho?
Young girl with Texan accent #2: Oh, that’s like where they have all the discount shopping places.

–R train

Headline by: dan

Runners-Up:
· “Bush Twins…….Activate!” – stephie
· “In Texas, We Call It Mexico…” – Michael Haigh
· “There’s a Wal-Mart in SoHo?” – Chuckles
· “They Were Disappointed with DUMBO, Too.” – nick

Click here to see the new Headline Contest

Clearly They Know Better Than to Ask Directions

Tourist #1: Y’all! Didya look at the map? It weren’t on the map, I’m tellin’ ya!
Tourist #2: I’m lookin’ right here at this map an’ it don’t say nothin’ that I don’t already know.

Tourists #2 and #3 start to cross the street.

Tourist #1, screaming: Y’all! It ain’t that way!
Tourist #3: Stop talkin’ so damn country. You gonna get us shot!

–Rockefeller Center

Overheard by: Vicky

Oh, Just Like You Bringing Me to Orgasm?

Texan mom: It says here that the French gave this statue as a gift.
Texan dad: Ain’t no way France coulda sent that. They ain’t got no boat big enough.
Texan mom: But it says here…
Texan dad: Ain’t possible means ain’t possible. Gittit?

–Liberty Island

Overheard by: Colman