Archive for the ‘Republicans’ Category

Wednes­day One-Lin­ers Spend Most of Their Time Fundrais­ing

Man to guy try­ing to avoid him: Be­cause, you see — all Re­pub­li­cans are Nazis. I don’t know why no one else can tell.

–67th & Broad­way

Over­heard by: kendra

Thug to an­oth­er: Damn, nig­ga! That’s why the De­moc­rats ain’t go­ing to win the moth­er­fuckin’ White House in 2008!

–Union Square

Over­heard by: guy who’s not sure if it’s racist or not

Right­eous girl: I am glad I slept with him be­fore I found out he was a Re­pub­li­can.

–6 train, Up­town

Over­heard by: Su­san

Rollerblad­ing twelve-year-old to friend: Sean Han­ni­ty is such a douche!

–44th and 8th

An­ti-Bush crazy at an­ti-war stand on the street: There’s an id­iot in the White House! There’s an id­iot in the White House! .… Ac­tu­al­ly, he’s a mon­key — we got the DNA re­sults back!

–Out­side of the Met

Man on cell: Well, they killed 3,000 peo­ple! …Nooo, not the Arabs, the Con­ser­v­a­tives — the New York Con­ser­v­a­tives!

–181 St & Ft. Wash­ing­ton, Star­bucks

Over­heard by: One of the teach­ers

Hobo: I hope I nev­er run for of­fice, be­cause you peo­ple aren’t the first group I’ve said fucked-up shit to.

–F Train

New York’s On­ly Re­pub­li­can

Woman: Did you just watch the Pres­i­den­tial de­bate?
Man: Yes, we did.
Woman: Are you Ker­ry sup­port­ers?
Man: No, of course not. Ker­ry is the worst pres­i­den­tial can­di­date in the last 50 years and he would be the worst pres­i­dent ever.
Woman: Oh, do you want to come to Good Morn­ing Amer­i­ca to­mor­row and stand out­side, wav­ing Ker­ry signs?
Man: I was be­ing en­tire­ly se­ri­ous. I hate Ker­ry.

The woman looks at him, un­be­liev­ing, and walks away in si­lence.

–Out­side the San Mar­cos bar, East Vil­lage

It’s Chap­paqua

Hobo: Come on out, De­moc­rats. Ad­mit it. You fucked up. Ad­mit it. You vot­ed for John Ker­ry. You fuck­ing De­moc­rats. You vot­ed for some­one who likes to dress up like a pix­ie.
Dude: I won­der what the ad­dress is on his vot­er reg­is­tra­tion card.

–18th & Irv­ing