Archive for the ‘Stupidity’ Category

He Want­ed to Buy It Now

Woman #1: I was sell­ing some stuff on eBay, but got scared.
Woman #2: Why?
Woman #1: Be­cause they kept ask­ing too many ques­tions.
Woman #2: Who?
Woman #1: The buy­ers.
Woman #2: Like what?
Woman #1: They want­ed to know if the Louis Vuit­ton bag and belt I was sell­ing was re­al. It freaked me out.
Woman #2: So what hap­pened?
Woman #1: I end­ed the sale, be­cause I had two peo­ple watch­ing me and I got scared.
Woman #2: Watch­ing you?
Woman #1: Yeah, they can watch to see who bids and how much they bid and then they can try to make a last minute bid.
Woman #2: Okay, but why did­n’t you sell the stuff?
Woman #1: I was scared and this guy kept ask­ing me to send pic­tures.

–Amy Ruth’s, West 116th Street

Over­heard by: Ann-Marie Nichol­son

That’s Not Re­al­ly By Choice, Fat­tie

Girl #1: Oh, look! Those clothes are cute. Let’s go look over there.
Girl #2: Those are ma­ter­ni­ty clothes.
Girl #1: Oh my God, no way!
Girl #2: Yes, see? It says “A Pea in the Pod Ma­ter­ni­ty Clothes”.
Girl #1: Oh wow, I had no idea!
Girl #2: Yeah, they are.
Girl #1: Well! There is­n’t go­ing to be a pea in this pod any time soon, I can tell you that!

–Ma­cy’s

Wednes­day Undie-Lin­ers

Guy: Oh, man! It is not a good day to be my un­der­wear!

–Wine Store, 75th & Am­s­ter­dam

Over­heard by: Raven

10-year-old to lit­tle broth­er: Hey! C’mere! You wan­na play Cap­tain Un­der­pants?

–Brook­lyn

Over­heard by: dog­boy

Guy on cell: I’m not pay­ing her to smell your un­der­wear!

–57th St & Broad­way

Over­heard by: Lagsa­lot

Loud old­er gen­tle­man watch­ing peo­ple at sub­way en­trance: They don’t wear brassieres any­more!

–23rd St & 6th Ave

Over­heard by: Zom­bie Boyfriend

Old­er la­dy in fu­ner­al pro­ces­sion be­hind bag piper wear­ing kilt: I looked. He’s wear­ing un­der­pants.

–120th & Broad­way