Archive for the ‘Teens’ Category

The Wednesday One-liners NYC Tour Guide

Black woman: This here is Chelsea. It’s where all the rich homosexuals live.

–18th Street between 7th & 8th

Teenage kid: There are some hot Chinese bitches at this stop, son!

–Fulton Street G station

Overheard by: Thomas Bugarin

Woman: Well, I’m in Soho now…

–Union Square

Overheard by: Davis McDavis

Queer: Oh, I went to Queens once. By accident. I was coming back from La Guardia and the taxi driver said he was taking me on a shortcut.

–Starlight, Avenue A

Overheard by: Lukas

Thug: Next stop: Ghettoville, USA! That’s real America, none of this Japanese-American bullshit. Mmmm…smell that? Smells like the East Village!

–A train

Guy: This is the new Wall Street Times building.

–41st & 8th construction site

Man: See, that’s the one. If I was gonna write it a letter, I would begin, “Dear Ugliest Building in New York City”.

–Westin Hotel, Times Square

Overheard by: Kayla Cagan

Guy on cell: Bond Street? It’s north of Houston Street so it’s not in Soho. But I don’t know what the neighborhood is called.

–City Hall Park

The Unbearable Lightness Of Wednesday One-Liners

Rastafarian man to white basketball female player with dreads: Hey! Why you white people always trying to look like me!

–Union Square

Black guy selling Empire State Building tickets: You're from Scotland? I love the Scots… They're puuuuuuurrreee white!

–Outside Empire State Building

Black woman to another, about frat guys nearby: Man, white people are so loud.

–109th & Amsterdam

Overheard by: Becks

Black hobo to white teen: Get out of this neighborhood with your white crotch! You don't belong here!

–Upper West Side

Black woman to cops walking away: But I'm a Caucasian!

–Bed-Stuy

Knowing is Half the Battle

Teen boy #1: Man, I tell you, da reason France don’t want us in Iraq is dat dey know the second we done in Baddad we is headed right over the border and straight into Paris.
Teen boy #2: Nigga, you’se is ignorant. Iraq ain’t next to no France.
Teen boy #1: Nah man, I ain’t sayin it is right up on France, but, you know, it goes Iraq, Germany, some otha country, then France, so it is close.
Teen boy #2: Ain’t you eva seen no map? I’ma gonna show you when we get to school. That shit is in Africa, between Lidia and Egypt.

–F train

Overheard by: Ed Salcedo

Guy: I asked you if you knew where he lived; you pointed to Iraq!
Girl: Well, I don’t know. How was I supposed to know?
Guy: Iraq is not the same as Israel.

–Duane Reade, 28th & Park

Overheard by: Jack B

That Reminds Me; Flavor of Love is On

Teen girl #1: I like him cause he’s tough, but he ain’t thug.
Teen girl #2: Oh, he’s thug. He got that tattoo, he wears his pants all baggy and he got that great big coat.
Teen girl #1: Yeah, he got that tattoo, but them other things…he just short.

–A train

Overheard by: iiams

Wednesday One-liners Have Cool Spiny Backs and Tiny Tiny Brains

Woman: That movie’s so stupid! They got King Kong and the dinosaurs fighting even though they are from different centuries.

–Mama’s Pizza, 106th & Amsterdam

Overheard by: Kyle T

Teen girl: You know, I don’t think I even believe in dinosaurs.

–Starbucks, Astor Place

Overheard by: Paul