Archive for the ‘Theater’ Category

The On­ly Thing That Could Make Rent Bear­able.

Rent­head #1: He was­n’t *that* bad as Roger.
Rent­head #2: Weren’t you drunk last time you saw him?
Rent­head #1: Yeah. That’s prob­a­bly why. When I’m drunk I’m more like “Oh, his hair’s shiny,” rather than “Wow, he has no emo­tion.“
Rent­head #2: His hair is shiny. (pause) Next time he’s on as Roger, let’s get drunk.

–Ned­er­lan­der The­atre

Though I’d Rather Hei­di Klum Woke Me Up

Wife: I think we might need a stiff drink af­ter this.
Hus­band: (does­n’t re­spond)
Wife: It’s sup­posed to be sad.
Hus­band: I think I want to take a nap now.
Wife: Do you want me to wake you up when the show starts?
Hus­band: (grunts)
Wife: Was that a yes or a no?
Hus­band: Yes.

–Cher­ry Lane The­atre

Over­heard by: Emi­ly B.