Tourist woman looking at Radio City Music Hall: That’s where the Rockets are.
20-ish son: Who are the ‘Rockets’?
–50th & 6th
Archive for the ‘Tourism’ Category
…And Letting Me Steal Your Wallets?
Old man: Are you guys tourists or something?
Couple: Yes.
Old man: Is that why you're walking so fucking slow?!
–8th St Station
Overheard by: Mary Button
I Think We Need to Change Our URL..
Woman: Oh God, I can’t believe we’re actually in Manhattan. Don’t call it New York.
Girl: Uh uh.
Woman: The locals don’t call it N-Y-C. There’s many boroughs, call it Manhattan. We don’t want to stick out!
Girl: Mom, shut the hell up.
Woman: Language! I’ve got the brochure for the Sex in The City Tour. Do you wanna get a Cosmo?
–Penn Station
Overheard by: Twalia LaRue
Law & Order Finally Begins to Run Thin on Plot Scenarios
Tourist: We're jaywalking in front of a policeman!
Policeman: Heh.
–Jackson Heights
Overheard by: pop pop
Demolition of My Conscience Is Almost Complete
Law student #1: How was your summer?
Law student #2: Off the hook. Italy is the third fucking world. Poverty kicks ass when you don’t have to deal with it, like, every day.
–Mercer & 3rd
Wednesday One-Liners Flunk the Polygraph
Woman on cell: I can't come. I'm in the Poconos right now.
–Rite Aid, The Bronx
Punk girl on phone: Hi mom…yeah… Yeah, me and Jane are just walking around in the neighborhood… Yeah, we're at the Time Warner center right now. No! No, of course I'm not on St. Mark's. No. I'd never go there. Of course I'm sober! Why wouldn't I be? Yeah. Okay, love you, bye! (hangs up phone, now to friend with beer) Gimme some of that!
–St. Mark's Place
Russian guy on phone (in Russian): Yeah, I'm on Avenue M. I just got off, I'll be there in a few.
–Q Train, Kings Highway
Overheard by: Robert
Dude on cell: Yo! What's up? I'm waiting at LaGuardia.
–Martin Luther King High School
Overheard by: Susan Volchok
Guy on cell: Yeah, I'm on Long Island right now. I'll be here for a little while.
–Park Slope
Female suit on phone: I have to cancel dinner tonight, I had that meeting I told you about, remember? And I'm still not back yet. Yeah. Yeah, I'm in Jersey still.
–Washington Square Park
Woman on cell outside a pub: Honey? It's mommy. We're still at the hospital. I don't know, we could still be here for hours.
–1st & 72nd
Overheard by: Well, there were hospitals nearby, at least
Usually It’s Too Hot to Be Angry All the Time
Street promoter: Yo, do you like rap music?
Teenage Tourist: I’m from the South.
–Times Square
My Deepest Condolences for the Death Of Your TiVo
British tourist to passing New Yorker: Excuse me, could you please tell me where…
New Yorker, walking briskly: Fuck off! I got problems of my own!
–E 77th & 2nd
Overheard by: D M A
Wednesday One-Liners Love
Entertainment Weekly
Tourist girl, Pointing at a set of glass windows: Hey, isn’t that where Carson Daly lives?
–Times Square
Overheard by: Max Bivona
What's So Great Aboot Wednesday One-Liners, Eh?
Man on subway, about to exit: Obama, Islam, Canada. Obama, in Islam, and Canada. (exits train)
–Downtown D Train
Overheard by: katiekatydid
Thug to tourists: How do you say "thank you" in Canadian?
–34th & 7th Ave
Overheard by: Fluent in Canadian
Student: I'm so sick and tired of your Canadian condescension.
–Eugene Lang College
Crazy Brooklynite at a payphone: The Queen owns everything! She owns Europe, she owns Africa, and she owns Canada! The one thing she doesn't own is the US. So could somebody give me a US quarter for a Canadian quarter?
–Broadway & 8th St
Ditzy blonde to another: Do we look Canadian?
–Chelsea
Overheard by: Holls