Archive for the ‘TV’ Category

Uggs Are So Over

Old lady leaving The Tony Danza Show #1: Grazie!
Old lady leaving The Tony Danza Show #2: Why didn’t you wear the right shoes?
Old lady leaving The Tony Danza Show #1: No, no, these are fine.
Old lady leaving The Tony Danza Show #2: Aaaah, blow me. They’re terrible.

–66th between Columbus & Central Park West

Overheard by: MojoSaves

More Americans Get Their Delusions from ABC News Than from any Other Source

Woman: I used to be delusional.
Friend: What was happening, were you medicated?
Woman: Oh yes, I had to be severely medicated. I thought I was going to marry Peter Jennings.
Friend: Was it hard for you when he died?
Woman: Actually, I was selfishly happy because I didn’t have to worry about having delusions about him anymore.

–W 105th St & Amsterdam Ave

Aqua Teen Hunger Wednesday One-Liners

Suit on cell: Nah, don’t even bother callin’ that fuckin’ guy. At 4:59 he pulls the steam whistle and slides down the Brontosaurus tail.

–45th & 7th

Overheard by: Fred F.

Homegirl to another: Yo, you remind me of my nigga, SpongeBob!

–125th & Amsterdam

20-something babe: Optimus Prime is my boyfriend!

–Union Square cinema

Suit: The winter after I graduated college I watched a lot of Cartoon Network.

–8th St & 6th Ave

Overheard by: jonesy

Girl: Yeah, you know, it’s just like the time I dyed myself blue, only the guy I was with was colorblind so he couldn’t even tell! Hey, haven’t you ever wanted to know what it feels like to be a Smurf?

–1 train

Fat professor: In order to avoid economic loss you have to look deeper than the average bear.

–Pace University

Overheard by: random student