Archive for the ‘Vagina’ Category

Wednesday One-Liners Celebrate V-J-J Day

Girl to male friend: I mean, they were both lousy lovers, but when it came right down to it her vagina was just too wide.

–110th & Broadway

Ghetto teen: Yo, girl! Don’t be pickin’ at yo’ pussy like that in the street! You’ll be on YouTube tomorrow!

–South St Seaport

Overheard by: Big Larry

JAP: I don’t understand how a baby just fell out of her vagina and she didn’t feel anything!

–Outside Lafayette St dorm, NYU

Overheard by: Philouza

Girl on cell: I fully support the idea of a vagina factory.

–7th St & Bedford Ave

Overheard by: Liam Cubbin

Bimbette: Tiff, do these make my vagina look furry?

–Dressing room, Macy’s

Overheard by: SarahM

Chick: My vagina seems so crooked today…

–23rd & 5th

Overheard by: Bruce

Girl on cell: No! He was seriously, like, drilling for oil or something. My vagina is not a source of fossil fuel!

–Central Park

Overheard by: But it’d be cool if it were

The End Of Western Civilization: An OINY Short Story.

Lawyer #1: I saw this funny video on YouTube last night. I did a search for “retards” and there was this one called “retarded Britney Spears fan.” It was a retard singing one of her songs.
Lawyer #2: Have you seen 2 Girls 1 Cup?
Lawyer #1: I was able to watch about two seconds of it before I had to click it off.
Lawyer #2: Did you see the one called “extreme pain”? I could only watch about five seconds of it. A guy was cutting off his own dick.
Lawyer #1: That's some sick shit. How's your cat?
Lawyer #2: You should see her. She rolls over on her back and my dog licks her between the legs for a long time, then smacks his lips.
Lawyer #1: You should video that and put it on YouTube. Call it “eating pussy.” You'll get a million hits!

–Civil Court, 141 Livingston St., Brooklyn

Overheard by: Big Larry