Archive for the ‘Vomit’ Category

Wednes­day One-lin­ers Teach Your Chil­dren Well

Preg­nant woman to 3‑year-old son: Do you re­mem­ber what hap­pened last time you licked the sub­way? That’s right. You threw up.

–4 train

Over­heard by: Leo­ra

Par­ent: My son is on­ly two years old, sit­tin’ at the bar, talkin’ ’bout “old school.” How you gon’ talk ’bout “old school” when you two years old? I think my broth­er taught him that.

–Mer­rill Lynch lob­by, Broad­way & Park Row

Mom to 4‑year-old: Stop cry­ing and take a mo­ment and think about how you feel.

–Broad­way & 104th