Chick: How’s the leg?
Guy: They can’t find it anywhere…Halloween, you know.
Chick: Well, next year, don’t go as a pirate.
Guy: The thing is, next year I kind of have to go as a pirate.
–Central Park Zoo
Chick: How’s the leg?
Guy: They can’t find it anywhere…Halloween, you know.
Chick: Well, next year, don’t go as a pirate.
Guy: The thing is, next year I kind of have to go as a pirate.
–Central Park Zoo
Old Latina: Nice flowers.
Hispanic guy: Thanks. Unfortunately, they’re for a dead person.
–1 train
Overheard by: Chris McDade
A mom points to the window of a sex shop, at a jacked mannequin wearing a mask and feather boa. She says: Hey honey, maybe that’s what you could be for Halloween.
Little boy: No, Mommy. I want to be a fireman.
–Christopher Street
Overheard by: Jon
Guy: So you still going to be an elf for Halloween?
Girl: No, actually I’m going to be a fairy, but fairies are part of the elf family.
–6th & B
Girl: Ginger is what pussy would look like if it was sliced.
–Sako Sushi, Amsterdam Avenue
Overheard by: Joanna Kim
Girl: What is that?
Guy #1: Tuna.
Girl: Tuna with what?
Guy #2: Tuna with delicious.
–Sushi Seki, 1st Avenue
Overheard by: KMR
College girl: Is it possible to bring back the dead?
Professor guy: Well, for now, scientists are working on making a
single cell, which is creating life. That’s not the same as bringing
back the dead. That poses the “life after death” question.
College girl: I think about zombies all of the time.
Professor guy: All of the time?
College girl: Yeah, I’m always thinking about zombies.
Professor guy: What do your parents think?
–Meyer Hall, Washington Place
Overheard by: Steven Greenbaum
Queer: Can you hold this shirt for me ’til tomorrow?
Shop trannie: No, we can’t put costumes on hold.
Queer: Well, I want to be, like, this Louis XIV go-go boy, and I already got the short shorts and everything, and this shirt would go perfect but I just can’t afford it ’til tomorrow.
–Halloween Adventure, 4th Avenue
Overheard by: sharyn jackson
Girl: Do you have any more slut-nurses?
Counter guy: No, we’re all out of slut-nurses, but we have some slut-devils and some slut-flight attendents.
–Ricky’s, 8th Avenue
Overheard by: Josh Caldwell
Guy: What’s she going as for Halloween?
Girl: A newsie.
Guy: Oh.
Girl: I knew she’d steal my idea, stupid ho-bag.
–Elevator, Water Street Residence
Overheard by: Dan & Travis
Guy: I’ve always loved this mask, it’s so cool.
Girl: Yeah, I guess.
Guy: I mean, I guess I should, considering…
Girl: Right.
Guy: I mean, I was in the movie.
Girl: That was like a decade ago.
Guy: So?
Girl: Yeah, but you were a fucking extra. And you didn’t even have a single line.
–Ricky’s, 22nd & 3rd
Guy: What is this, All Harlots’ Eve?
–3rd Avenue & 8th Street
Overheard by: Adam Nathan
Copygirl: UK?
Chick: The United Kingdom.
Copygirl: The United Kingdom? Where’s that? Hey, Joyce! Where’s the United Kingdom?
Chick: …England. In Europe.
Copygirl: But I don’t see it here. British Columbia, Quebec, British
Isles, but no United Kingdom.
–Kinko’s, Duane Street
Overheard by: Jess McGins
Girl #1: I actually showered before I saw you today, aren’t you impressed?
Girl #2: Uh, yeah.
Girl #1: Yeah, I had to…I smelled like old sex.
–Republic, Union Square
Overheard by: Sasha
Guy: Did you know that there are homeless people who live underground in the abandoned subway stations?
Girl: You mean like underground people? Wait, I’ve heard of them, they have a weird name!
Guy: Like “underground people”?
Girl: No, I saw it on Felicity.
–14th & 6th
Overheard by: peter
Girl #1: Hey, I lived on the street with the street kids for like, six months. On the street. They were on drugs and stuff.
Girl #2: Why?
Girl #1: Because it was fun…It was really only on weekends, though.
–St. Marks
Guy: I’m sick of these homeless hipsters. It’s like, you’re fucking
hipsters!
–St. Marks & 1st
Hat Tip 🎩 to The Marketing Scientist