Archive for December, 2005

Not Exactly Cutting It Close

Girl #1: I can’t believe last year you had a boyfriend and this year you have a girlfriend! It’s like so nasty.
Girl #2: Oh please, next year you’re going to have a girlfriend too.
Girl #1: Hell no I ain’t. I made it through last year without a girlfriend and I’ll make it through this year too!

–6 train

Overheard by: Kimberly 

That’s Why God Uses It as Punishment

Girl #1: You’re going off the pill? What about STDs and AIDS?
Girl #2: Yeah, and babies!
Girl #1: STDs and AIDS are worse than babies.
Girl #2: True.

–Madison & 26th

Overheard by: K8 

Girl #1: …It’s so scary how time flies.
Girl #2: You know what’s even scarier than that?
Girl #1: What?
Girl #2: AIDS.

–68th & Broadway

Overheard by: Anne O. 

Hobo’s Quick with the Puns

Hobo: So you two ladies want to go with me, I have a room at the Plaza?
Girl #1: No.
Hobo: Are you sure?
Girl #2: Please leave us alone.
Hobo: Okay, I’m a gentleman. See, I’m going to leave you alone. So will you come with me to the Plaza?
Girl #1: No.
Hobo: Okay. See I’m a gentleman, I’m going to leave you alone. You have a nice night.
Girl #1: Bye.
Hobo: Don’t fucking patronize me!

–32nd & 2nd

The Toe-curling Orgasms Are Sure a Plus

Dude #1: So it’s either lots of bran every day, or just wake up to a cigarette and coffee. Works for me every time.
Dude #2: So there’s a health benefit to your vices, huh?
Dude #1: I guess so.
Dude #2: I wonder if gay guys have good shits. Maybe that’s a benefit of anal sex.
Dude #1: I’ll stick to cigarettes and coffee, thanks.

–Starbucks, Brooklyn Heights

Overheard by: iiams