Archive for 2005

Well, He’s Not in a Co­ma!

Girl: Yeah…but I have my pe­ri­od, so we can’t have sex.
Guy: That does­n’t mat­ter. See? It just shows that I love you.
Girl: What it shows is that you want head.

–St. Marks & 3rd

Over­heard by: Brock

It Was One Hell of a Long De­liv­ery

Twin girl #A: It’s my birth­day on Sun­day…
Unique girl #1: Oh, so like, your sis­ter was the one whose birth­day it was Thurs­day. God, this must be so con­fus­ing for you guys.
Unique girl #2: Um, no, I high­ly doubt it is. They’re twins; they were born on the same day!
Unique girl #1: Did your par­ents just change it on the birth cer­tifi­cate to make it less confusing…or what? I would’ve just let you guys keep the dif­fer­ent birth­days.

–40th & 5th

This Queer Thing Makes More and More Sense

Girl: We should to­tal­ly start pre­tend­ing to go out and make out in pub­lic, and then every­one will be like, “But I thought Mark was gay?”. And they’ll all be so con­fused.
Mark: Okay, I’m down, but you’re gonna have to get me like 6 shots of Jager­meis­ter be­fore we start.
Girl: Why do you need to be drunk? I’m pret­ty!

–116th Street 1 sta­tion