Drunk guy: I lost my voice last night; I haven’t lost my voice since high school.
Sober guy: Only little bitches lose their voice.
Drunk guy: True.
–1st Avenue between 3rd & 4th
Archive for 2005
He Knows What Today Is
Black cyclist guy: Where’s all the black people around here? Did y’all eat all the black people?
White girl: They taste yummy!
–Houston & West Broadway
Overheard by: alyssa
Go Ask a White Girl
Girl: Are those tighty whities?
Guy: Yeah, it’s laundry day.
Girl: Then why drop your drawers in a bar?
–Danny Boys, Staten Island
Overheard by: bawookie
I Guess She’s Got a Big Cock, Then
Tipsy chick #1: Like, I kept drinking, but it really didn’t taste like there was any alcohol in it. So I just kept drinking.
Tipsy chick #2: You are a fratboy’s dream.
–Macdougal between 3rd & Bleecker
Overheard by: djlindee
Oh Crap, They’re Seceding Again
HS girl: So how was your love life over the summer?
HS boy: I hooked up with the Prime Minister of Georgia’s daughter.
–67th & Amsterdam
It Did Almost Get Away From Us There
Actor guy #1: Are you from the South?
Actor guy #2: The South of this country?
–Lehman College
Overheard by: BriGuy Ferrari
It’s All Brave New World Up in Here
Girl: Is your package big?
Guy: …I don’t know…depends on what my mom ordered.
–116th & Broadway
Overheard by: Bowserhsu
The Taming of the Shrewd
Chick #1: What is that, [a picture of] a barn?
Chick #2: No, it’s the Globe.
Chick #1: What are you, a wench?
–Perry & West 4th
They Must Have Seen X-men
Ghetto guy: Dat movie was da bomb.
Ghetto hoochie: Yeah guy, 10 thumbs up!
–City Cinemas Village East, 2nd Avenue
Overheard by: Faceman
Haven’t You Heard of This Midwest Place?
Guy: We could go to Coyote Ugly.
Girl: Or Cheap Shots!
Guy: Ugh.
Girl: Boo-yah! I bet that’s the only place down here I could yell “boo-yah” and people would yell it with me. With sincerity.
–1st Avenue & 9th Street