Archive for 2005

Please God, Say They Didn’t Do It on the Train

Bag lady: …but I got 33 days credit.
Hobo: Yeah, but you know if you get locked up again, you’re gonna be there for 60.
Bad lady: I know, then I’ll do half.
Hobo: I can’t believe that guy did that to you. I’m gonna set him up like a bowling pin. And you know what happens to bowling pins: they get knocked out.

–Staten Island Railway

Overheard by: David D.

Tastes Not-So-Great, More or Less Filling

Guy #1: Dude, do you actually have a refrigerator this time?
Guy #2: Yeah, of course.
Guy #1: Good, ’cause I don’t want an infection like I got last year from putting the beers in the toilet tank
Guy #3: Man, you chilled the beers in the toilet?
Guy #1: No dude, the toilet tank! I thought I would be safe but I woke up with one swollen eye and two swollen fingers.

–Bodega, 12th & B