Girl #1: So, I don’t know, I guess I’m giving up manicures for Lent.
Girl #2: Really? Shit! I’m not. Robbie would not be cool with that.
–Washington Square Park
Overheard by: Katie M.
Archive for February, 2006
Test Some in a Kid First
Man: She needs to be on something.
Woman: She is; haven’t you seen all the medicine bottles on her desk?
Man: She’s got medicine on her desk? Let’s go get some.
–50th & 8th
Overheard by: Jelly Bean
This Protractor’s Really Shitty
Guy #1: Ever notice you can’t fart on these subway seats?
Guy #2: I think it’s the angle; I’ve had that problem before.
–4 train
Overheard by: Mike
These Seats Are Really Shitty
Woman: Excuse me, where’s the restroom?
Usher guy: Sixth seat on the right, ma’am.
–Eugene O’Neill Theater, West 49th Street
Talk About Hitting the Right Note
Guy #1: Shouldn’t you guys be out looking for jobs instead of practicing four part harmonies?
Songbo: Shouldn’t you be sucking his dick?
Guy #2: He does have a point.
–R train
Less Seeds
Chick: I wanna get some juice.
Guy: What juice?
Chick: POM juice.
Guy: Oh, please.
Chick: What’s wrong with POM juice?
Guy: It tastes like pussy.
Chick: Like my pussy?
–Whole Foods, Union Square
He Should Be Getting Her Drunk
Man: Do you work or go to school?
JAP: I work.
Man: Really? Because you look young.
JAP: How old do you think I am?
Man: 19?
JAP: Do you really think you should be hitting on a 19 year old girl?
–Falucka, Bleecker Street
Meanwhile, Mary Jo Looks Like Two-Face
Woman #1: Did anyone ever tell you that you look like Amy Fisher?
Woman #2: No.
Woman #1: Well, you do. I mean what she did was wrong and all, but she was a beautiful woman, so are you.
–6 train
She Hails from Crawfordheim
Vendor guy: Do you like manga? Have you heard of yaoi?
Woman: I’m sorry. I’m German. I’m a little retarded when it comes to language.
–Jacob Javits Center
She’s Calling It Rape Now?
Suit #1: So, they fired everyone in your department, but they offered you to stick around for two months and help them with the transition period?
Suit #2: Yeah, they said that there was a very good chance they would keep me on a permanent basis if everything went well.
Suit #1: And you said…
Suit #2: I told them to go fuck themselves. I mean, you can’t come into my house, rape my mother, and then expect me to go out drinking with you.
–3 train
Overheard by: J.J. Taveras