Archive for March, 2006

Howie Mandel in 5 Years

Girl #1: I don’t understand why he’s so popular.
Girl #2: It’s obviously because he’s a drug dealer.

–Broadway between Grand & Howard

Dealer guy: Hey man, buy some weed?
Yuppie guy: Sure. And while I’m at it, why don’t I just not send my
kids to school, get them addicted to heroin, and leave them on the
street to die?
Dealer guy: You sure you don’t want some weed?

–Washington Square Park

Never Forget

Woman #1: God, that was so funny when all of those Nazis walked into the courtroom and their hairstyles were like Hitler’s!
Man: Well, I mean, it makes sense, I guess. You know, people always copy famous people when it comes to stuff like that.
Woman #2: Yeah, like remember when I had that terrible Dorothy Hamill haircut?

–Houston Street station

Yes, It Would Be

Girl #1: That’s so funny. I’ve always said, “That would be two of us.” So how do you use it?
Girl #2: “That would behoove us.”…Well, you don’t use it that way. You say “of”. “That would be hoove of us.” As in, that would be smart of us.

–Q train

Overheard by: Morgan