Archive for 2006

She Watched All of Bat­man For­ev­er

Queer: It’s hap­pen­ing again. My eye is to­tal­ly twitch­ing.
Guy: No, I don’t see any­thinig. are you sure?
Queer: I’m sure. I can feel it. I can feel it but no one can see it. It’s twitch­ing.
Guy: I don’t see it.
Queer: It’s not my eye­ball, it’s here. This is so gross.
Guy: Yeah, i just don’t see it.
Queer: It is so dis­turb­ing. This hap­pens to Sheila, too, and no one else can see. On­ly it’s half of her face.

–1 train

Over­heard by: Cherie

Thank God He Had Life Alert

Guy #1: So I was standin’ in front of the door in the train the oth­er day, and this old la­dy shoves me like three times when the doors opened. I stepped aside to look at her and I pushed her like this.
Guy #2: What did she do?
Guy #1: She just looked and me and walked out. Fuck­ing bitch!

–N train

Some Even Watch the Mon­i­tor, Too

Woman #1: They done got my pay­check wrong again. I’m so up­set.
Woman #2: How’d they do that this time?
Woman #1: I don’t know, with com­put­ers these days, you type in one thing wrong and it ain’t gonna come out right.
Woman #2: Y’­know, it’s those young girls in the of­fice that don’t pay no at­ten­tion to what they’re doin’.
Woman #1: You’re right! They have their fake press-on nails and damn fake hair. And they spend all day run­ning their fake nails through their fake hair in­stead of watch­ing the key­board.
Woman #2: Oh, you’re just jeal­ous.

–2 train