Archive for 2006

So He Doesn’t Cure Social Diseases?

Bartender: Yeah, I know him, he’s a professor of social studies at Columbia.
Middle-Aged woman: That’s my school! I think it’s so great that he’s a social worker.
Bartender: Um, he’s a professor of social studies.
Middle-Aged woman: Right, a social worker.
Bartender: No, he’s a professor of social studies. That doesn’t make him a social worker.
Middle-Aged woman: No?

–81st & Amsterdam

Cream Rinse

Teenage girl #1: Well, did you know he was going to come all over your chest, or was that a suprise?
Teenage girl #2: I don’t think he even realized he was doing it.
Teenage girl #1: Oh…I think I see some of it in your hair.

–Crosstown bus, 79th St

Overheard by: very interested

Maybe if You’d Gone Down on me Like I Asked You to…

Little boy: Mom! Look, candy! I want candy!
Mother: No, you can’t have candy. Besides, they only put that there to trick you into buying it when you don’t really want it. It’s called an impulse buy. Do you want to be tricked?
Little boy: Mooom! Why won’t you buy me caaandy?!
Mother: Because I don’t love you enough.

–Blockbuster, 8th & Broadway

Overheard by: Emily